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sca2511
Member
(01-12-2017, 01:32 AM)
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Likely when they're ready to.
Seirith
Junior Member
(01-12-2017, 01:32 AM)

Originally Posted by Autumn Wind

There is no max age. However parents should push to have their kids work as soon as possible be it 14-16 and charge rent. The problem becomes if you are paying nothing. You have to contribute something.

In my case, my mom cannot drive so I have to drive her to doctor appointments or run various errands.

I do not want to get married or have children so living with a prospective girlfriend is out because that will eventually come up.

wait... a 14-16 year old should be charged rent? Wtf.
lostsupper
Ban history includes:
- Insulting fat people
- Saying Phil Fish deserves harassment because he's a jerk
- Being a jerk in fitness threads
- PMing a user "fuck you".

Sounds like I am triggered and need a safe space.
(01-12-2017, 01:35 AM)
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18, snowflakes. Time to cut the cord.
Einhander
Member
(01-12-2017, 01:36 AM)

Originally Posted by Hoo-doo

Oh, and my government provides every student out there with money and free public transport country-wide. So they wouldn't be struggling one bit.

Therein lies your flawed logic. Applying your country's beneficial policies to an entire world. Try making that work in the US for an 18 year old.
Daingurse
Member
(01-12-2017, 01:38 AM)
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Originally Posted by Soapbox Killer

I want to walk around naked. When shit breaks, I know who did it. Plus leaving the nest young and seeing the world through your own eyes is awesome.

I can't imagine being 20 plus and still living at home. I wanna drink beer and have reckless sex on the couch and not have to keep quiet about it. Where I'm from there are certain things you don't do at your parents home. I'm old school.

I have a pretty good situation in my house compared to most. I can smoke trees with my mom in the same room. Feels good man.
The Hermit
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(01-12-2017, 01:45 AM)
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Originally Posted by entremet

Because the majority of these scenarios are not true independence. Parents are paying for college and kids usually come back for summers and holidays.

It doesn't count. It's some faux independence that people use to feel better.

However, there are exceptions of kids who truly move out and are independent at 18, but those are rarer.

This is so true.

My brother left my parents house to study in Argentina with 18 years old. He graduated mid 2014, returned to my parents house in Brasil, and still haven't earned a single Real ( our currency). He is 29.

I left my parents house last year with 30.

I pay all my bills, have a car, stable jobs, and I am even investing. This year I'll probably expand my mother's clinic.
Samurai G0SU
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(01-12-2017, 01:46 AM)
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Based on cultural beliefs snd circumstances.

Setting a set age is cold blooded. Aka you really dont care about your kids.
SpecX
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(01-12-2017, 01:48 AM)
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Moved out at 21 - 22 and never looked back. I tried pulling off the full-time job and staying at home, but when my parents started demanding I pay 1/2 the mortgage and utilities just for myself staying there I bailed quick. It was completely unfair and even trying talking them out of it wasn't an option. I had no problem paying a reasonable rent, but giving up most my pay to fund them a easier life wasn't going to happen.

I joke with my wife that I will put the kids out at 18, but really I want them to be prepared and responsible when they move out.
norm9
Member
(01-12-2017, 01:50 AM)
Whenever you get a certificate from school that says you graduated.
Valkerionseven
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(01-12-2017, 01:50 AM)
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Like others said, setting a limit on it is silly these days. The old ways of 18, go to college = moving out and never returning is outdated thinking. Even if it is ingrained, especially in Western thinking, it just ain't viable for everyone.

Moving out when it makes sense is fine. My brother tried to move out when he was 16 and lived pay check to pay check for 5 months, eventually moved back in when he was 20 for a year and a half. I went to college, moved back in after and left at 26 for another country (The ultimate move out haha). Which was viable because I lived at home and saved some money and headaches.

For my kids I won't set a limit as long as they have some viable goal.

Also depending on which country I live in at the time it might make more sense to keep them at home rather than kicking them out.
JDHarbs
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(01-12-2017, 01:54 AM)
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Kids don't have a responsibility to move out by a certain age, but parents have a responsibility to prepare their kids to.

Parents should always be getting their kids ready for it, but never pressure them into a deadline to do it by.

I'm 24 and still living like I'm 15 because my parents never did anything to prepare me. I'm just now learning how to do things like drive or search for a job. I'm miserable every day because of how behind I feel. Please don't let your kids have to go through this.

Teach them to fly, but let them choose when to make the leap.
RinsFury
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(01-12-2017, 01:55 AM)
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Originally Posted by JDHarbs

Kids don't have a responsibility to move out by a certain age, but parents have a responsibility to prepare their kids to.

Parents should always be getting their kids ready for it, but never pressure them into a deadline to do it by.

I'm 24 and still living like I'm 15 because my parents never did anything to prepare me. I'm just now learning how to do things like drive or search for a job. I'm miserable every day because of how behind I feel. Please don't let your kids have to go through this.

Teach them to fly, but let them choose when to make the leap.

Why are you miserable? I'd have loved an extra six years of childhood, the real world sucks. 24 isn't old or anything, I wouldn't worry about being behind.
norm9
Member
(01-12-2017, 01:59 AM)

Originally Posted by JDHarbs

I'm 24 and still living like I'm 15 because my parents never did anything to prepare me. I'm just now learning how to do things like drive or search for a job. I'm miserable every day because of how behind I feel. Please don't let your kids have to go through this.

You didn't have any initiative as teenager? I don't think you can blame your parents for that.

ETA- Sorry, don't mean to come across harsh. I mean, didn't you just do stuff anyways without the approval or permission of your parents?
Last edited by norm9; 01-12-2017 at 02:03 AM.
Seiryoden
Junior Member
(01-12-2017, 02:01 AM)
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16 or 24. Possibly 37? We can all agree on 64. Maybe 72?

Depends on a family's individual circumstances don't you think?

*ellipsis*
LilWayneSuckz
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(01-12-2017, 02:03 AM)
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Not age.

They should move out when they've found a career and a livable wage.
JDHarbs
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(01-12-2017, 02:03 AM)
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Originally Posted by RinsFury

Why are you miserable? I'd have loved an extra six years of childhood, the real world sucks. 24 isn't old or anything, I wouldn't worry about being behind.

Kind of hard to make friends, date, or get a job when you can't handle basic things everyone else your age can.

Originally Posted by norm9

You didn't have any initiative as teenager? I don't think you can blame your parents for that.

ETA- Sorry, don't mean to come across harsh. I mean, didn't you just do stuff anyways without the approval or permission of your parents?

It's okay.

I struggled greatly with anxiety growing up. I wanted to do all of those things, but was literally afraid of doing them. Having a helping hand instead of being ignored would've kept me on track.
Last edited by JDHarbs; 01-12-2017 at 02:08 AM.
ZiZ
that ain't rice
it's bits of Semtex
(01-12-2017, 02:04 AM)
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They can stay as long as they need. That's the whole point of having a family.
The Lamp
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(01-12-2017, 02:05 AM)
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In some cultures it doesn't happen. You live with your spouse and your parents.

I moved out at 19 for college but graduated and moved back in with the family at 24 because it's near my job and I need to save money because millennial problems and crippling debt.
LilWayneSuckz
Member
(01-12-2017, 02:07 AM)
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Originally Posted by Bruce Springsteen

When they're ready

This is the correct answer.
Monocle
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(01-12-2017, 02:07 AM)
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As soon as their mom squirts them out onto the pavement! No freeloaders!
Stereogatari
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(01-12-2017, 02:07 AM)
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Originally Posted by JDHarbs

Kids don't have a responsibility to move out by a certain age, but parents have a responsibility to prepare their kids to.

Parents should always be getting their kids ready for it, but never pressure them into a deadline to do it by.

I'm 24 and still living like I'm 15 because my parents never did anything to prepare me. I'm just now learning how to do things like drive or search for a job. I'm miserable every day because of how behind I feel. Please don't let your kids have to go through this.

Teach them to fly, but let them choose when to make the leap.

100% can relate to you.

I'm 25 always lived at home and haven't been taught much about responsibilities.

I wasn't self conscious about it until a recent event. A long distance relationship didn't work out, this crushed me as I had never felt such happiness in my life and so losing her made me reassess my life, and this thead's subject in particular since since she is also 25 and has lived in dorms in high school, Undergrad, 3 months abroad and now for her Masters.

Truth is though, it would be a waste of money for me now. I guess I should have lived out in dorms when I was at uni, but I never felt comfortable with that back then. My introverted personality and coddled way I was raised led to things turning out as they did.

On the positive side at least I've had my "freeing from The Matrix" moment and can make amends now to be more productive with house responsibilities and stepping out of my parents' shadow.

For example I've never done grocery shopping in my life. How fucking stupid is that? I can't help but look at my parents and be like "why didn't you teach me these things?" I mean I'm not absolving myself of blame but after being raised like this it's a self-fulfilling prophecy.
JDHarbs
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(01-12-2017, 02:13 AM)
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Originally Posted by Stereogatari

100% can relate to you.

I'm 25 always lived at home and haven't been taught much about responsibilities.

I wasn't self conscious about it until a recent event. A long distance relationship didn't work out, this crushed me as I had never felt such happiness in my life and so losing her made me reassess my life, and this thead's subject in particular since since she is also 25 and has lived in dorms in high school, Undergrad, 3 months abroad and now for her Masters.

Truth is though, it would be a waste of money for me now. I guess I should have lived out in dorms when I was at uni, but I never felt comfortable with that back then. My introverted personality and coddled way I was raised led to things turning out as they did.

On the positive side at least I've had my "freeing from The Matrix" moment and can make amends now to be more productive with house responsibilities and stepping out of my parents' shadow.

For example I've never done grocery shopping in my life. How fucking stupid is that? I can't help but look at my parents and be like "why didn't you teach me these things?" I mean I'm not absolving myself of blame but after being raised like this it's a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Are you me one year from now? How did the Crash collection turn out?
Valkerionseven
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(01-12-2017, 02:14 AM)
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Originally Posted by JDHarbs

Kids don't have a responsibility to move out by a certain age, but parents have a responsibility to prepare their kids to.

Parents should always be getting their kids ready for it, but never pressure them into a deadline to do it by.

I'm 24 and still living like I'm 15 because my parents never did anything to prepare me. I'm just now learning how to do things like drive or search for a job. I'm miserable every day because of how behind I feel. Please don't let your kids have to go through this.

Teach them to fly, but let them choose when to make the leap.

more or less was my situation too. Some parents are just like that man, it rubs off on their kids too. For me I was always less ambitious to ask for things being the younger kid. My brother was the type to ask for EVERYTHING no matter how crazy, and my mom would eventually give in and do it. Hence me getting into games more and more and finding things to let me stay out of their way like RPGs. Our family wasn't rich but my bro would ask for like... $1000 worth in dj equipment because he wanted to try, mom would do it, say how expensive it was, and I would hook on to things like that and not ask for anything myself. Ended up not doing a lot of things I wanted to do growing up but I'm ok with being more reserved and paying attention to things like that.

At 27 I moved to Japan and "got gud" so to speak. First time living alone and 'figuring life out' was in a completely different country with a different language. It's not hard to grow up but having to do it on your own with little parental guidance at the 'usual ages' stuff happens sucks. You'll be fine man, trust me. Just cause it takes more time to do the usual stuff does not mean its impossible or some massive disadvantage. Shit I still don't have a drivers license and I'm turning 29 this year. -omg im turning 29 this year-

on topic, here in Japan though most of my friends still live with their parents or general family. Once again that 24-35 range. My ex lived with her brother two years younger than her, though both have some amazing jobs and could afford an insane house separately if they wanted, but got a small 3 room apartment to save money for the future. Many live with their parents simply because its what is done here. Maybe move out for a while once your married, then move in with parents again or have them move in depending if you live in the same town.

Alot of people here stay with friends though if they have their own places. I have Japanese friends stay over randomly (a few I barely know haha, one I literally never talked to before letting them stay the weekend -doormat-) because they need a break from their parents for a weekend lol or want to drink a lot after/before work.
Last edited by Valkerionseven; 01-12-2017 at 02:21 AM.
Shadybiz
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(01-12-2017, 02:15 AM)
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When they're ready. Your responsibility to your child does not end when they turn 18. Whenever I hear a person say that they're having a child, and that they'll have 18 years of responsibility for that child, I automatically assume that they will be an awful parent.
Autumn Wind
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(01-12-2017, 02:17 AM)
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Originally Posted by Seirith

wait... a 14-16 year old should be charged rent? Wtf.

$50 a month maybe is fair, no?
KdylanR92
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(01-12-2017, 02:17 AM)
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I moved out when i was 18 so I think the 20's is still fine but 30's is pushing it.
I Stalk Alone
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(01-12-2017, 02:20 AM)
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My clones will move out as soon as they come off the production line.
backslashbunny
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(01-12-2017, 02:21 AM)
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I'm 28. I get free rent from my parents. I moved out when I was 22, after college, and lived on my own, paying for myself. My parents were really upset though, and pressured me to move home. When I got a new job, and then into graduate school, in the same city as them, I moved home.

Now I work, but in the same city, so I don't see the need to move out. I save 2k of rent a month. My parents want me at home (they have some issues about their poor little daughter out in the big bad world.) I'm glad they don't mind that I live at home because I save a shit ton of money.

As soon as I save enough for a down payment, and my fiance graduates from school, we'll probably move out. That could be another four years, so I'm not going anywhere soon!
Cabal
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(01-12-2017, 02:25 AM)
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As a parent, whenever they are ready is the right answer for me. I want my kids to thrive but I'm by no means ever going to push them out the door. If I did my job well, they will be ready to go long before I want them to move.
BreakyBoy
o_O @_@ O_o
(01-12-2017, 02:26 AM)
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- Age 19: I moved from Florida to California.
- Age 21: Came back to live with my parents. Worked full-time / school part-time off and on.
- Age 26: Moved out again. This time into a house I rented with three friends.
- Age 30: Moved back in with parents to save money to buy a house, and to help them out as they were setting up for their "senior" years.
- Age 33: Have enough money for a large down payment saved, but I opted to move to Seattle. Might buy in a year depending on how I feel about Seattle/state of the housing market.

If you have a good relationship between the parents and the kids and everyone acts like an adult, it really doesn't matter.
Jzero
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(01-12-2017, 02:27 AM)
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Originally Posted by Hoho for breakfast

I had next to nothing when I moved out at 18, but I got a job, an apartment, and then bought a house and now have a family of my own.

Yea this isn't likely anymore (on a minimum wage job), especially here in L.A.
Mawnster
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(01-12-2017, 02:31 AM)
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Originally Posted by Autumn Wind

There is no max age. However parents should push to have their kids work as soon as possible be it 14-16 and charge rent. The problem becomes if you are paying nothing. You have to contribute something.

...What.
Parch
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(01-12-2017, 02:56 AM)
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The majority of boomers were given a reasonable amount of time to move out. That would be 4 or 5 days after high school graduation.

Times have changed.
FrigidEh
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(01-12-2017, 03:06 AM)
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If you have a good relationship with your parents and no issues with your living arrangements then it makes sense to stay until your mid to late twenties, at least now in Canada.

My sister lived in the basement until she was 27. I have a full-time job lined up after I graduate and I'm not planning to move out until around that age too.
The Faceless Master
(01-12-2017, 03:08 AM)
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there's no age limit.

as soon as they want to live by their own rules they can go.
SweetDonuts
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(01-12-2017, 03:21 AM)
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Why would you set an age limit and kick out your own kid?
Phoenix RISING
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(01-12-2017, 03:24 AM)
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My oldest is 10. My youngest will be 8 in seven days.

When they graduate from HS, they can stay, but they will have to have a job.

Also, my house, my rules.
Parch
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(01-12-2017, 03:26 AM)
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Originally Posted by SweetDonuts

Why would you set an age limit and kick out your own kid?

Because there was a time when sink or swim rarely meant sink. Bootstraps were a thing.
Knuckle Sandwich
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(01-12-2017, 03:27 AM)
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I'm hoping they beat feet between 18-20.
Dr. Feel Good
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(01-12-2017, 03:30 AM)
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If you have debt (student, credit, whatever), live in the same city as your parents, and don't live with your parents, you're dumb. Take advantage of limited expenses if you can to pay off debt or build up savings as soon as you can, it will pay off immensely in the future.
Tagyhag
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(01-12-2017, 03:33 AM)
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I would let my child stay 3-5 years after college, let them start their career, save up money, and be off when they're financially stable. Any time after that I'd have to ask them what the hell's the hold up lol.

My parents would have probably done the same for me. I lived on campus and then stayed 2 years at home after graduation while I saved up some money.
Zen Aku
Junior Member
(01-12-2017, 03:34 AM)

Originally Posted by _Nemo

When you can afford to. In this day and age of sky rocketing cost of living, setting an age limit is stupid.

This.
Parch
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(01-12-2017, 03:38 AM)
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Originally Posted by Dr. Feel Good

If you have debt (student, credit, whatever), live in the same city as your parents, and don't live with your parents, you're dumb. Take advantage of limited expenses if you can to pay off debt or build up savings as soon as you can, it will pay off immensely in the future.

That's not the kid's choice. It's the parents.

Be extremely grateful if allowed the opportunity. Instead of allowing their kid the opportunity to save money, some parents chose to save for their retirement instead. It is totally within their right to kick out their kid when they no longer have the legal obligation to support them.
The sink or swim philosophy is lot more common than some people want to believe. Many feel that's the correct way to parent.
Qblivion
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(01-12-2017, 03:39 AM)
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I'm 27 and I just moved back in with my dad ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Valkerionseven
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(01-12-2017, 03:39 AM)
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I would of course expect my kids to help contribute to the house hold in ways that they can. Be that by helping with expenses through a minimal rent and what not or helping around the house. I mean heck, if they live there too, I would expect them to want to help keep it a decent place through things like usual house work.

Does surprise me when I see adults living at home not even helping around the house a bit.
FinalStageBoss
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(01-12-2017, 03:41 AM)
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Well I'm not throwing my kid out when they hit 18. I wouldn't mind if they stayed with me till they finished college tbh, save as much money as possible.
NandoGip
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(01-12-2017, 03:41 AM)
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18
George Washington
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(01-12-2017, 03:42 AM)
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There is no right or wrong age. I would give them enough time to finish their degree (reasonable timeframe), find a job, then move out.
Weevilone
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(01-12-2017, 03:46 AM)
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Originally Posted by Bluemongoose

I am 37 and still live at home. Come at me.

I had kids late. If mine stick around until they are 37 they'll just inherit the place when I die and keep going. I was looking forward to retirement too. :-(
Weevilone
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(01-12-2017, 03:51 AM)
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Originally Posted by highrider

I grew up in an unstable home, and from my teenage years I never felt secure there. Went in the army at 17 just to get out. People romanticize the self made life, and I have respect for those that can do it, but for me it was just a tough, shitty experience early on. I'd rather have a failure to launch kid that was happy.

I'm thinking there's probably a middle ground for most people.. somewhere between fleeing an unstable home at 17 and living with mom and dad forever because hey, why go off and spend your own money..

Obviously there are many exceptions and situations as well, but I cringe when I hear people say they don't do it because it would be a waste of money. My mom's in her 70s and I'm sure it would still make a good business case to still live there, money saved and all. Nope.

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