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casey_contra
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:26 PM)
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Hey GAF!

Like so many people in today’s day and age, I’m on a few dating apps. Whether you are looking for a time-waster, friend-maker, fun-finder or love-matcher, there is an app to suit your needs. Apps like these give us opportunities to construct an identity as we see fit. I see sexy profiles, funny profiles, honest profiles and, yes, some sad profiles. My question to you GAF, is what role do video games play in your dating app activities (conversations, profiles, pictures, dates, successes, etc.)?

My personal favorite app for dating is Scruff, geared towards gay men. As you can see below, it actually has a spot for your XBOX and PSN IDs.



Since gaming is a large part of my identity I feature it prominently on my profile, both in what I’m looking for and in my description. I like to put what I’m currently playing and have engaged in some great conversations because of it.



Biggest success story: I reached out to someone who had “Switch” in their Grindr profile and the next day actually met up with him to attend the Switch and Play preview event. It was entirely platonic, but it was nice not having to go alone. This was an experience made possible because of Grindr.


Some questions to get discussion started:

Do you use dating apps?

Does your app have a designated place for video game ids?

How do you incorporate video games into your profile, if at all?

Have you ever had “success” (whatever that looks like for you) because of a mention of video games in your dating profile/conversations? What was it?
WaterAstro
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:28 PM)
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You should include it. It's your hobby, and you want others to accept that hobby.
r3n4ud
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:29 PM)
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Nah. I dropped that bombshell when things got serious.
hydrophilic attack
(04-20-2017, 05:29 PM)
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lolno

gamergate moved gaming acceptance back decades in the public consciousness
entremet
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:30 PM)
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No. Not out of shame, I just find gaming rare among the demographic of women I pursue. I also tend to put more social hobbies over solitary ones. So reading, TV, gaming are not really mentioned much.
shiyrley
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:30 PM)
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You should, I don't use dating sites but if I did I would include it. It's as valid as any other hobby and I wouldn't really want to be with someone who doesn't accept it
Juke Joint Jezebel
who will protect our men?
(04-20-2017, 05:31 PM)
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Back when I used to look for dudes on dating sites, you can bet your arse I did. "Gurl Gamer" has a bit of a draw to it in some circles!
MetroidPrimeRib
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:31 PM)
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Why be fake? Just put it on there.
Kudo
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:31 PM)
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Never used an app, but if a person visits my room I think it'll be quite obvious.
valeu
Junior Member
(04-20-2017, 05:31 PM)
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definitely. if we don't have common interests i lose interest fast
Bedlam
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:32 PM)
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As a guy looking for girls? No, unfortunately the world is not yet ready for this.

As a girl? Yeah, you'd probably receive even more attention (at least I'm encouraged when I see this).
Nickle
Cool Facts: Game of War has been a hit since July 2013
(04-20-2017, 05:32 PM)
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... You put your Gaf username in your dating profile?
LambdaTeos
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:33 PM)
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Yep, it's part of introducing myself, since it is part of my daily life

Sometimes I use Scruff and Growlr, but not that often, I barely have time hahaha

And I've met good people that introduce themselves as gamer fans too, good friends (yeah, no chemistry for dating haha)

Of course I have received messages like "oh you play games? aren't those for children? ' or something.. I just ignore those messages
Jawmuncher
(04-20-2017, 05:33 PM)
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I put it on as a back piece but not a main focus.
commish
Jason Kidd murdered my dog in cold blood!
(04-20-2017, 05:33 PM)
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I would not include it unless I specifically wanted to date someone into games. Even if gaming is more "accepted" in 2017, many non-gamers associate gaming with playing games 15 hours a day to the exclusion of everyone and everything else. There will always be that snap judgment made by some folks, even if they would be totally okay with it in reality. When online dating, a girl receives billions of messages from guys and is just looking for a reason to exclude certain ones (all else being equal). I don't think girls are at the point of accepting gaming as just another hobby.
Cert.in.Death
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:33 PM)
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No, I leave that for the second date at least
Stopdoor
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:33 PM)
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I'm pretty conflicted on this. I realize making it a big focus of a profile or including some sort of cringy gaming jokes or something is bad, and many people would say leave it out entirely, but man, it seems like it'd be best to put that up front with how big a hobby it is for me. It'll come up and ideally it's not as an awkward thing on a date. I guess keep it minimal and off to the side, and leave it out of cramped and quick to judge profiles like Tinder entirely?

I just want to play Kirby & the Amazing Mirror with a girl though, is that so hard to ask??
casey_contra
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:33 PM)
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Originally Posted by entremet

No. Not out of shame, I just find gaming rare among the demographic of women I pursue. I also tend to put more social hobbies over solitary ones. So reading, TV, gaming are not really mentioned much.

I think that's something I often forget... others feel free to chime in but I think amongst men (and gay men) gaming is a lot more common and something to bond over.

I love starting a conversation with "What games are you playing" or something. Or being coy and asking "what are you into?" getting some vulgar response and replying "nooo I meant in terms of video games."

Gosh I'm annoying.
casey_contra
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:35 PM)
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Originally Posted by Nickle

... You put your Gaf username in your dating profile?

Hahaha, yeah why not?! No one has brought it up but I figured it would be fun if I connected with a fellow gaffer over Scruff.
hydrophilic attack
(04-20-2017, 05:35 PM)
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i'm considering including that i'm a tagged member of neogaf, what do you think
dragonlife
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:35 PM)
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I would if I used such apps.
Numb
(04-20-2017, 05:35 PM)
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Originally Posted by r3n4ud

Nah. I dropped that bombshell when things got serious.

"I got something to say. I played Smash for 5k hrs"
Falchion
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:36 PM)
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Even though gaming is definitely my favorite hobby, I have plenty of others that are better at starting conversations and attracting women. I'd rather put stuff like riding my motorcycle, lifting, running, and other outdoor activities than gaming. I figure everyone has indoor activities like reading or watching TV that they do in their freetime so I don't bother mentioning that gaming is my choice of those.
casey_contra
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:36 PM)
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Originally Posted by hydrophilic attack

i'm considering including that i'm a tagged member of neogaf, what do you think

I'd woof at ya

(in the app that's how you "like" someone lol. It's so silly)
Memento
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:36 PM)
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That sure is an interesting profile...

You even put your GAF user name.
sixteen-bit
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:36 PM)
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That's the first bullet on the list

  • Gamer
JordanKZ
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:36 PM)
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Not a chance.

Despite gaming being a huge part of my life, it's not my entire existence nor do I think it needs advertising. For many suitable guys/girls (depending on your preference) its just a huge turn off.
commish
Jason Kidd murdered my dog in cold blood!
(04-20-2017, 05:36 PM)
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Originally Posted by Numb

"I got something to say. I played Smash for 5k hrs"

Okay that's pretty funny. If my GF knew how many hours I put into Destiny she'd be floored, even as she knows I played all the time. It's just seeing a big number is terrifying.
Juke Joint Jezebel
who will protect our men?
(04-20-2017, 05:37 PM)
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Originally Posted by Numb

"I got something to say. I played Smash for 5k hrs"

Acquiescence
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:37 PM)
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I don't have a dating profile, but rest assured, if I did then my love for Dead or Alive Xtreme 3 would be expressed through every possible avenue.
hydrophilic attack
(04-20-2017, 05:37 PM)
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Originally Posted by casey_contra

I'd woof at ya

(in the app that's how you "like" someone lol. It's so silly)

a/s/l
commish
Jason Kidd murdered my dog in cold blood!
(04-20-2017, 05:37 PM)
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Originally Posted by Juke Joint Jezebel

Okay I actually almost choked hahah
Swiggins
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:38 PM)
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I say I play videogames...but I don't say which ones and I don't really go in depth with it.
Mushroomer25
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:38 PM)
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I casually mention it, alongside other interests and favorite bits of media.

I'm also regularly surprised how many women lead with gaming as their main interest. Might just be where I live (Portland area), but it's fairly normalized.
dlauv
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:38 PM)
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No. I secretly hope to be whisked away from this life and never have the urge to return.
Whiskeymatt
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:39 PM)
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No. Not out of shame or anything, it's just not a significant enough part of my identity to be worth mentioning as one of the first things a potential partner on a dating site/app should know about me.
Pinky
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:39 PM)
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;)
pretty done
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:39 PM)
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Originally Posted by JordanKZ

Not a chance.

Despite gaming being a huge part of my life, it's not my entire existence nor do I think it needs advertising. For many suitable guys/girls (depending on your preference) its just a huge turn off.

I mean if it's a huge turnoff to them then there's a 100% chance it's not going to work out anyway

To answer op though, I only use tinder and no I don't have gaming anywhere on there.
DAREALGUMMY
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:39 PM)
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Gaming is something I'd vaguely want to have in common if it is.
Ultima_5
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:39 PM)
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nope. there's 0 reason to do so.
Piggus
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:40 PM)
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Just put it out there and make your hobbies apparent right away. If someone considers you unworthy of a date solely due to the fact that you play games, that person isn't worth your time.
primovinny
Junior Member
(04-20-2017, 05:40 PM)
If you're looking for girls gaming is a big red flag sadly. It gives the girls the message that you're not fit, you won't give her much attention when at home and all stereotypes associated with games. I read this a few years back in the r/okcupid a few years back and many people shared their story about this. If you're a girl this isn't actually needed as girls get many more views and messages than guys but if you want to sell yourself as a gamer girl you'll attract gamers more often.

Remember: if you want to get lucky you have to sell yourself and games sadly are a big no-no for most guys.
Usobuko
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:40 PM)
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Nope.

I probably spent more time watching movies than playing games and I don't include either.
Pyroclastic
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:42 PM)
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if you get laid/ anything further with a neogaf mention in there then I gotta applaud you for truly having success in tailoring your pursuits/audience.

I don't usually messaging girls who mention gaming because I assume they have higher than average messages even by online dating standards. But maybe they want to filter out bozos like me idk

Beats me touting Pale Moon as an alternative to firefox anyway.
Last edited by Pyroclastic; 04-20-2017 at 05:45 PM.
BGBW
Maturity, bitches.
(04-20-2017, 05:42 PM)
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Of course. I need them to know that I know how far gaming has come since Super Mario World.
Kilau
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:42 PM)
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If they don't recognize my profile name (ButtSmasherr) is a gaming reference, then they aren't worth my time.
DVCY201
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:42 PM)
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Go for it. Just don't include your height in your profile like I do lol
xeroborn55
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:43 PM)
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Met my current girlfriend of 2+ years on okcupid. I did not list video games in any way on my profile. Didnt seem like a prudent thing to do at the time i guess
Soldiussnaku
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:45 PM)

Originally Posted by Piggus

Just put it out there and make your hobbies apparent right away. If someone considers you unworthy of a date solely due to the fact that you play games, that person isn't worth your time.

Pretty much this.

Mentioned it in my interests to my wife on our first date 6 1/2 years ago. When gaming was no where near as ubiquitous as it is today. She mentioned she played as a kid, and we struck a conversation over it. If anything it gave us one more topic to speak about, which in turn allowed me a better chance with her.

I mean come on, nowadays even MORE people play games hours a day and gaming is more socially accepted then ever. Back in 2010 it was far less common and accepted.
Last edited by Soldiussnaku; 04-20-2017 at 05:54 PM.
Atom Heart Mother
Member
(04-20-2017, 05:45 PM)
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To alot of people gaming isn't a hobby, so its better to just mention it than write it on a profile.

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