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creatchee
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:08 PM)
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Originally Posted by PseudoViper

Yes, as mother with 2 kids, gaming and my 2 kids are the first things I mention in my dating profile.

If you can't get past these first two things then there's no reason to talk. Simple as that.

I like your style.
Amory
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:08 PM)
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No.

Like it or not there's still a stigma associated with video games and people who play a lot of them / consider it a hobby.

My girlfriend learned very early on in our relationship that I play a lot of games and own a lot of game systems (and tech in general), but I wanted potential online matches to see who I actually am before they knew that I play video games. Despite good intentions, some people can't separate "gamers" from immature basement dwellers.

No use shooting yourself in the foot.
iBlue
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:09 PM)
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Depends on the girl you are seeing. But yeah I would tell them I am into gaming my the second date I gueds
spekkeh
(04-20-2017, 06:09 PM)
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I don't date because I'm happily married, but if I did, I'd certainly mention it, because it's such an important part of my life. Then again, it's also my job so no point in hiding it anyway.

Of course I wouldn't put down the actual games like YookaLaylee, because in spite of games being important to me, I also don't want to come off as an asocial monomanic moron.
creatchee
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:10 PM)
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Originally Posted by Amory

No.

Like it or not there's still a stigma associated with video games and people who play a lot of them / consider it a hobby.

My girlfriend learned very early on in our relationship that I play a lot of games and own a lot of game systems (and tech in general), but I wanted potential online matches to see who I acually am before they knew that I play video games.

No use shooting yourself in the foot.

But playing a lot of games IS who you are. Any stigmas attached to them or any other tech is the responsibility of your potential significant other to either get over or walk away from - not yours.
SystemUser
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:10 PM)
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When I was last on a dating site I had a line in my profile that you should message me "if you have a gamerscore over 5000, a PS trophy level over 5 or own a Wii U or a gaming rig so that you can help me with the hard parts". It was meant more as a joke line, but good amount of positive responses to it and no negative. That is the only gaming reference I have ever put on a dating profile.
SweetJohnnyCage
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:10 PM)
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I did and I've been with my girl for over a year now. She's not a gamer but she loves watching me play stuff, especially Dark Souls and Zelda. She helped with a bunch of shrines in BotW.
Cess007
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:11 PM)
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Originally Posted by BouncyFrag

I'd go a step further and demand specifics. Not curing the Krogan genophage or callously leaving the mabari hound to die at the beginning of Dragon Age would be deal breakers for me.

"Did you romanced Chie or Yukiko?" That's the dealbreaker question
Sectorseven
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:11 PM)
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Dating profile, you want me to cheat on my waifu?
InfiniteBento
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:11 PM)
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if a controller emoji counts then sure
Kanik
Sonic handles my blue balls
(04-20-2017, 06:12 PM)
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Nah, it would ruin the surprise.
Massicot
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(04-20-2017, 06:12 PM)
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I do. Figure that I would want to date someone that's going to gel okay with it rather than pretend it's not something important to me.

Not that I've had any luck. I've thought about reconsidering.
brawly
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(04-20-2017, 06:13 PM)
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It's still a stigma in Switzerland, so no.
casey_contra
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(04-20-2017, 06:13 PM)
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Originally Posted by spekkeh

I don't date because I'm happily married, but if I did, I'd certainly mention it, because it's such an important part of my life. Then again, it's also my job so no point in hiding it anyway.

Of course I wouldn't put down the actual games like YookaLaylee, because in spite of games being important to me, I also don't want to come off as an asocial monomanic moron.

x_x

See, to me that's a conversation starter. I figure (maybe incorrectly) that if they don't know what it is they just kinda ignore it, but if they do then they might ask about it.
Man Called Aerodynamics
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(04-20-2017, 06:13 PM)
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Originally Posted by creatchee

But playing a lot of games IS who you are. Any stigmas attached to them or any other tech is the responsibility of your potential significant other to either get over or walk away from - not yours.

That's fine in theory, but do you really want to scare away potential partners before they meet you and get the full picture, when it didn't have to happen?
tiredheadcrab
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:14 PM)
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Yes of course. Its a part of my identity. So is reading and creating so I put those in there as well. In fact reading the GoT novels has gotten me a good amount of dates. Great conversation starter. Talking to a cute red head right now about it.
creatchee
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:16 PM)
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Originally Posted by Man Called Aerodynamics

That's fine in theory, but do you really want to scare away potential partners before they meet you and get the full picture, when it didn't have to happen?

I'd rather be upfront about it before either I catch feelings and start to compromise my enjoyment of games to fulfill somebody else's expectations or they actively try to change me.
casey_contra
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:16 PM)
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Originally Posted by tiredheadcrab

Yes of course. Its a part of my identity. So is reading and creating so I put those in there as well. In fact reading the GoT novels has gotten me a good amount of dates. Great conversation starter. Talking to a cute red head right now about it.

Is she more of a Sansa or a Ygritte?
Amory
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(04-20-2017, 06:16 PM)
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Originally Posted by creatchee

But playing a lot of games IS who you are. Any stigmas attached to them or any other tech is the responsibility of your potential significant other to either get over or walk away from - not yours.

Like I said, I'd never actually hide it from someone once I've met them. I'm not ashamed of it or anything.

I just didn't choose to highlight it in a limited field of information that was determining whether or not I got a date with someone I'm interested in.
xeroborn55
Junior Member
(04-20-2017, 06:16 PM)
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Originally Posted by SweetJohnnyCage

I did and I've been with my girl for over a year now. She's not a gamer but she loves watching me play stuff, especially Dark Souls and Zelda. She helped with a bunch of shrines in BotW.

My girlfriend has mentioned a few times she would watch me play games. That just doesnt appeal to me. Playing a game is me time. I put on headphones and dont worry about anyone else. When i play games i want to play the way i want to. To forward through text at my own pace, go where i want to go etc. Spend 15 minutes in a crafting or item menu in a rpg if i want and not worry about my grilfriend getting bored.

A lot of her knowledge of games is from growing up with brothers and watching them play games. She hates final fantasy because it was boring to watch for example. She thinks my taste in games is weird and has asked me a few times if i like call of duty lol.

That said, bless her heart, she bought me a ps4 for my birthday a few weeks ago for persona 5. Which she hated right off the bat because it has menu combat like final fantasy
Last edited by xeroborn55; 04-20-2017 at 06:23 PM.
Sotha_Sil
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:16 PM)
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Funny enough, a light-hearted debate about the differences between western (me) and Japanese (her, she's Vietnamese) games is what kicked off my relationship. It was during a social event with my company, so drinks were involved. She was attracted to my passionate arguments. Been together two years.

I would put it in a list of hobbies, sure.
hydrophilic attack
(04-20-2017, 06:17 PM)
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Originally Posted by SystemUser

When I was last on a dating site I had a line in my profile that you should message me "if you have a gamerscore over 5000, a PS trophy level over 5 or own a Wii U or a gaming rig so that you can help me with the hard parts". It was meant more as a joke line, but good amount of positive responses to it and no negative. That is the only gaming reference I have ever put on a dating profile.

that's some low ass standards
tiredheadcrab
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:17 PM)
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Originally Posted by casey_contra

Is she more of a Sansa or a Ygritte?

She has a pretty good sense of humor and gives no fucks, so Ygritte.
DAREALGUMMY
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:17 PM)
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Originally Posted by creatchee

If gaming is a big part of your life and you don't put out, you're a lying liar and any match you find on that site will be based on a lie. I mean, if you're playing over two hours a day, it should be at the top of your interests and hobbies. Nobody cares about the whittling you do once every five months - they want to know what their days like would be with you and what things will be competing for your time.

Be honest.

If people have to compete with something for your time, maybe you shouldn't be in a relationship.
imBask
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:17 PM)
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i'm pretty sure you'll get hits regardless of mentioning gaming in your profile if you look like The Rock and have arms the size of Trumps ego. Yes there is some kind of stigma around gaming, but it's also about you sell yourself, a small "gaming" mention won't really destroy your chances most of the time unless you spend 3 paragraphs explaining why you think Ocarina of Time is shit in your bio. There's more to it than that, it's not a black or white situation

Like OP went way, way too deep, chill out brah
Last edited by imBask; 04-20-2017 at 06:22 PM.
Exploratory
is not Kawhi Leonard
(04-20-2017, 06:17 PM)
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Hahaha hell no dude. I can't blame girls for the stereotypes about gamers. I finesse them the best I can and drop that bomb a couple dates in.
Shredderi
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(04-20-2017, 06:17 PM)
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Guy: Honey, sit down. I think we're at the point in our relationship where you should propably know something about my past

Honey: Umm okay :D

Guy: No, seriously, you need to hear this from me before you hear it from someone else.

Honey: What? Well, what?

Guy: ...

Honey: Fuck, what is it? You've actually banged 200 different women? You've had orgies and threesomes with scores of women? :/

Guy: No, I... I played videogames 12h straight once when I was in college. THERE. I said it. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner.

Honey: That's... I mean, I'm glad you told me but... I dunno, I need some time to think, ok?

Originally Posted by hydrophilic attack

lolno

gamergate moved gaming acceptance back decades in the public consciousness

This. I wouldn't mention it anymore. I only mention gaming to people I already know play videogames as well. I'm fat, perpetually single so saying I play videogames would make it easy to associate me with your garden variety gamergaters. I don't want to risk that being the first impression of me because first impression is everything.
Numb
(04-20-2017, 06:18 PM)
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Originally Posted by hydrophilic attack

that's some low ass standards

The Wii U line stops all the casuals
amdb00mer
Member
(04-20-2017, 06:19 PM)
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Yes. No sense in not including it. Makes it seem like your hiding it or ashamed of it. Which I am not. I make it a point to put it out there. Actually have met quite a few ladies that were actually cool with it or gamed themselves. Also met some that did not bother to read the whole profile and then acted turned off by it. "You don't do it all day do you?" "I guess that's ok as long as you don't spend all your time and money on it. Cause, it's just a hobby, right?" No ladies I don't spend all my money or time on it, but it is a passion. Even if I don't get to game as much as I used to. I kind of commented on that in another thread about cheating on single player experiences in PC games, but that is off topic.

Also i'm a believer in the saying "a couple that games together, stays together"
Last edited by amdb00mer; 04-20-2017 at 06:25 PM.
Ryuuga
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(04-20-2017, 06:19 PM)
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Originally Posted by creatchee

I'd rather be upfront about it before either I catch feelings and start to compromise my enjoyment of games to fulfill somebody else's expectations or they actively try to change me.

heckmanimation
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(04-20-2017, 06:19 PM)
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if I had a dating profile I'd mention it, but i wouldn't highlight it
Last edited by heckmanimation; 04-20-2017 at 06:22 PM.
Exploratory
is not Kawhi Leonard
(04-20-2017, 06:21 PM)
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Originally Posted by creatchee

I'd rather be upfront about it before either I catch feelings and start to compromise my enjoyment of games to fulfill somebody else's expectations or they actively try to change me.

I think this is a cop out to the discussion to be had. You can usually tell very quickly how someone will respond to the revelation that you play a lot of games.
michaelius
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(04-20-2017, 06:21 PM)
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Yes but it is simple mention - the OP profile has way too much information suggesting scary nerdism.
creatchee
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(04-20-2017, 06:22 PM)
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Originally Posted by DAREALGUMMY

If people have to compete with something for your time, maybe you shouldn't be in a relationship.

The point of a relationship is to find somebody that is compatible with your life and makes it better. Also, most people have to compete with somebody's schedule. Try dating somebody with kids, or who is heavily into working out, or who is a full time worker and student. Obviously, video games may seem less important than those things, but if your time is compromised and spoken for, does it really matter what is taking it?
Sou Da
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(04-20-2017, 06:23 PM)
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My friend did this once, it was the smallest tidbit of a pretty extensively done profile.

Every single message she got was about games. Shit was hilarious tbh.
casey_contra
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(04-20-2017, 06:23 PM)
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Originally Posted by michaelius

Yes but it is simple mention - the OP profile has way too much information suggesting scary nerdism.

Y'all are savage.


But not incorrect. Meh... I do just fine.

Also, I wasn't sure how this thread would be received, but I'm really happy about the discussions this has prompted. Great work, Gaf!
tiredheadcrab
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(04-20-2017, 06:23 PM)
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Also to the people mentioning Gamergate and how thats a reason to not bring it up when talking to people.

I have been on about 5-6 dates in about a year from online dating and none of them would even remotely know what that was or give two shits. Maybe its because they were mostly from eharmony and match.com and they have vastly different priorities then getting involved to much in online drama.
elohel
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(04-20-2017, 06:23 PM)
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I include it in mine
Prompto
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(04-20-2017, 06:24 PM)
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I do and it's led to some fun times
imBask
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(04-20-2017, 06:24 PM)
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Originally Posted by casey_contra

Y'all are savage.


But not incorrect. Meh... I do just fine.

Also, I wasn't sure how this thread would be received, but I'm really happy about the discussions this has prompted. Great work, Gaf!

move "Dogs" to the top of your list and you'll get 50% more matches
Numb
(04-20-2017, 06:24 PM)
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Originally Posted by Sou Da

My friend did this once, it was the smallest tidbit of a pretty extensively done profile.

Every single message she got was about games. Shit was hilarious tbh.

Guys always searching for the elusive gamer girl
SweetJohnnyCage
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(04-20-2017, 06:26 PM)
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Originally Posted by xeroborn55

My girlfriend has mentioned a few times she would watch me play games. That just doesnt appeal to me. Playing a game is me time. I put on headphones and dont worry about anyone else. When i play games i want to play the way i want to. To forward through text at my own pace, go where i want to go etc. Spend 15 minutes in a crafting or item menu in a rpg if i want and not worry about my grilfriend getting bored.

A lot of her knowledge of games is from growing up with brothers and watching them play games. She hates final fantasy because it was boring to watch for example. She thinks my taste in games is weird and has asked me a few times if i like call of duty lol.

That said, bless her heart, she bought me a ps4 for my birthday a few weeks ago for persona 5. Which she hated right off the bat because it has menu combat like final fantasy

That's unfortunate, but nice of her to make that purchase. My girlfriend just asks questions as I plug away at games, or sometimes she says nothing at all. I would get worried about her getting bored, but she has told me multiple times that if she's bored, she's just gonna go do something else, so I don't worry about it. We're adults and live in the same house, there's other stuff for her to do if she wants.
casey_contra
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(04-20-2017, 06:27 PM)
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Originally Posted by Sou Da

My friend did this once, it was the smallest tidbit of a pretty extensively done profile.

Every single message she got was about games. Shit was hilarious tbh.

So this is interesting. Here is the sense I am getting:


Straight girl mentions gaming: huge plus

Gay dude mentions gaming: relatively neutral (though has been positive for me)

Straight guy mentions gaming: often/occasionally negative


2 Questions: do you agree with this? What about lesbians?
NeonBlack
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(04-20-2017, 06:27 PM)
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Take out all those bullets out and just put video games
Confused101
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(04-20-2017, 06:27 PM)
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Yes, I absolutely put it in my profile. It's my number 1 hobby and it, unfortunately, still has a bit of a stigma attached to it which seems to get worse the older I get. So I don't want to be with someone who thinks 35 year olds who plays video games are man-children.

Why wouldn't you put it on your profile? Isn't it part of who you are? Don't you want your prospective partner to like you for who you are? I guess if you only play a few hours per week then it's not terribly pertinent, but I play every single day for at least a few hours. It helps me wind down and stay connected with friends in other states. I simply couldn't be with someone who had an issue with that.

And lucky me, I don't have to. I found someone, with that dating profile, who doesn't have a problem with it at all and it's been the best relationship I've had full stop. I attribute this to being very upfront in my profile which included mentioning gaming.

If you're passionate about something, I feel it's important to put it in your profile so people have an idea of what to expect. "But, but Confused101, I'll drive away all the hot chicks when they see I'm a gamer." Guess what? That's someone you don't want to be with in the first place. At least, I wouldn't. Being slightly older in the dating game made me give less shits about how girls would judge me. I was looking for a quality relationship and I didn't want to waste time on someone who might not approve of what I like to do for fun. So fuck it. I put it in my profile. It worked out quite nicely.
creatchee
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(04-20-2017, 06:27 PM)
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Originally Posted by Exploratory

I think this is a cop out to the discussion to be had. You can usually tell very quickly how someone will respond to the revelation that you play a lot of games.

The discussion to be had is whether OP should put it on their profile. My contention is that if OP plays games during a significant portion of their free time, they should list it on their profile, just as they would anything else that takes up their time. And if somebody is turned off by that up front, then guess what? It wouldn't have worked out anyway if you had kept it on the DL! Unless you find somebody who can fuck the love of video games out of you, you're not going to stop playing them simply because you're in a relationship.
Mineshaft_Gap
4077th
(04-20-2017, 06:27 PM)
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Originally Posted by amdb00mer

Pic makes no sense since there's no such thing as local multi-player.
Stallion Dan
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(04-20-2017, 06:28 PM)
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Originally Posted by hydrophilic attack

lolno

gamergate moved gaming acceptance back decades in the public consciousness

More like no one has any clue what it is.
NeonBlack
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(04-20-2017, 06:28 PM)
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Originally Posted by tiredheadcrab

Also to the people mentioning Gamergate and how thats a reason to not bring it up when talking to people.

I have been on about 5-6 dates in about a year from online dating and none of them would even remotely know what that was or give two shits. Maybe its because they were mostly from eharmony and match.com and they have vastly different priorities then getting involved to much in online drama.

Nobody knows what gamergate is.
DAREALGUMMY
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(04-20-2017, 06:29 PM)
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Originally Posted by creatchee

The point of a relationship is to find somebody that is compatible with your life and makes it better. Also, most people have to compete with somebody's schedule. Try dating somebody with kids, or who is heavily into working out, or who is a full time worker and student. Obviously, video games may seem less important than those things, but if your time is compromised and spoken for, does it really matter what is taking it?

Sure it matters. Responsibilities and sacrifices are part of a relationship. I'd much rather be accepting of someone who has kids or works than someone just wasting my time who can't balance time with their hobby and spending time together.

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