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PotionBleue
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:08 PM)
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I don't understand, do you use the hook-up app primarily to find gaming friends? Or do you also have sex with the men?
spekkeh
(04-20-2017, 07:08 PM)
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Originally Posted by casey_contra

x_x

See, to me that's a conversation starter. I figure (maybe incorrectly) that if they don't know what it is they just kinda ignore it, but if they do then they might ask about it.

It's definitely a conversation starter, but only if they're into games. See it like this, imagine there's a profile that says 'I like tuning my car'. Now, that's probably a big turnoff for some, and a big turn on for some others, but the majority will likely go, 'okay not my hobby, but if I pictured him covered in grease then that's kinda hot, I guess I could start a conversation about it, who knows I might tolerate or even kind of enjoy it'.

Now imagine that instead of just saying 'I like tuning my car' it also adds 'my favorite brands of spark plug manufacturers are Bosch, Autolite and KSG, what are yours?'.
You'd probably think, gotta steer clear of this freak.
casey_contra
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:11 PM)
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Originally Posted by PotionBleue

I don't understand, do you use the hook-up app primarily to find gaming friends? Or do you also have sex with the men?



Hahaha, no I've made a few gaming friends. More so than playing games I've had some great conversations about games.
SarusGray
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:12 PM)
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"I'm a gaymer" To this day, only one guy messaged me about the gaming part .
LordKasual
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:12 PM)
If gaming / nerd shit is a big part of your life, and you're on a dating site and don't mention it...like, what are you expecting out of the dating website? You're basically begging for a chemistry-less date. Unless you're only looking for sex, in which case i guess you're fine, just don't expect much else out of it. After a while of not including any nerd shit whatsoever on my profile, i've long since decided to just (GASP) be myself, and the quality of the chicks i match with are significantly better, even when we both match just for sex. In fact I think it actually happens more now ironically...should have started doing it way earlier.

No matter what you look like, you will be faaaaar more attractive when you just own whatever you are into. If you try to straddle the fence, it'll probably be transparent and just come through as a lack of confidence, or you just being uninteresting. More importantly, girls who are only attracted to you physically may come to enjoy your hobby, solely because they enjoy being around you.

Unless you aren't physically attractive. In which case i'm sorry. :(
The_Spaniard
Netmarble
(04-20-2017, 07:17 PM)
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Yes, though some my reasoning might be different to the majority here.

First, I just mention it, I don't make it a significant part of my profile. As a hobby it makes sense to mention it in the same way as you'd list any other one. Most folks here seem to be on board with this.

Second, considering I work in the industry, it would be silly not to mention it when I point out my career path elsewhere.

Third, as a gay male its generally much safer to mention that you are a gamer to another guy.

I find it a bit odd how some people are saying, "No never!" as if you're suggesting talking about your kinks and fetishes in your dating profile.

Edit:

Originally Posted by SarusGray

"I'm a gaymer" To this day, only one guy messaged me about the gaming part .

Last edited by The_Spaniard; 04-20-2017 at 07:20 PM.
Socivol
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:19 PM)
Oh this thread....lol when I was dating people I didn't put that information in my profiles unless I was looking for just friends.
VaultBoy101
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:20 PM)
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Why doesn't anyone use question marks anymore
gameongreggy
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:21 PM)
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Innuendo that shit. "I got a joystick you can grab" and when she comes over, actually give her a switch controller. Gotta confuse the brain :)
Pinky
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:22 PM)
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Originally Posted by VaultBoy101

Why doesn't anyone use question marks anymore

Good point:
TangoAlphaLima
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:23 PM)
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No, but I do include dating in my gaming profiles.
Astral
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:25 PM)
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I think it's fine if it's not like your whole fucking profile. However, even just mentioning it is stigmatizing. There are too many people who will think you're a fucking loser for playing a game for hours and yet these same people binge watch TV shows all the time. Those are the ones that I think a small mention of video games in your profile will weed out, so I think it can be a good thing not to completely omit that side of you in a dating profile.
brawly
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:27 PM)
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Originally Posted by LordKasual

If gaming / nerd shit is a big part of your life, and you're on a dating site and don't mention it...like, what are you expecting out of the dating website? You're basically begging for a chemistry-less date. Unless you're only looking for sex, in which case i guess you're fine, just don't expect much else out of it. After a while of not including any nerd shit whatsoever on my profile, i've long since decided to just (GASP) be myself, and the quality of the chicks i match with are significantly better, even when we both match just for sex. In fact I think it actually happens more now ironically...should have started doing it way earlier.

No matter what you look like, you will be faaaaar more attractive when you just own whatever you are into. If you try to straddle the fence, it'll probably be transparent and just come through as a lack of confidence, or you just being uninteresting. More importantly, girls who are only attracted to you physically may come to enjoy your hobby, solely because they enjoy being around you.

Unless you aren't physically attractive. In which case i'm sorry. :(


Lol @ the notion that building chemistry with someone is based on her knowing that I play videogames. That's laughable. If you put that much importance on it, then by all means definitely include it in your bio. I can go an evening without talking about videogames just fine.
IronicSonic
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:27 PM)
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Originally Posted by r3n4ud

Nah. I dropped that bombshell when things got serious.

Originally Posted by Bedlam

As a guy looking for girls? No, unfortunately the world is not yet ready for this.

As a girl? Yeah, you'd probably receive even more attention (at least I'm encouraged when I see this).

Yeah... this.

Although, I linked my tinder account to my instagram account and there I have a full list on my interests
SarusGray
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:28 PM)
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Originally Posted by The_Spaniard

Yes, though some my reasoning might be different to the majority here.

First, I just mention it, I don't make it a significant part of my profile. As a hobby it makes sense to mention it in the same way as you'd list any other one. Most folks here seem to be on board with this.

Second, considering I work in the industry, it would be silly not to mention it when I point out my career path elsewhere.

Third, as a gay male its generally much safer to mention that you are a gamer to another guy.

I find it a bit odd how some people are saying, "No never!" as if you're suggesting talking about your kinks and fetishes in your dating profile.

Edit:

They were interested in other things ;-)

it was too damn long

my dating profile was more like a biography than anything LOL
pablito
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:29 PM)
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If I had dating profiles, I'd put it on there. Some ladies really hate it and we don't need to waste time on each other.
Wagram
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:29 PM)
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Never used it. but I would definitely put it in. I'm not ashamed of it and to be honest if I was dating someone with zero interest in them it would become a conflict at some point.

They don't want to waste their time either.
DylanEno
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:29 PM)
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What interests me:

Yooka-Laylee

lmao
NoFaceNico
(04-20-2017, 07:29 PM)
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Wait till she's pregnant, then tell her about gaming.
dh4niel
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:31 PM)
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I have done by I've rarely seen any women do the same.
gameongreggy
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:35 PM)
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Originally Posted by NoFaceNico

Wait till she's pregnant, then tell her about gaming.

That's just how you life. When she's on the table pushing the baby out, honey not now, I gotta finish this shrine.
deriks
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:35 PM)
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I only use Tinder, so my bio doesn't have on it. But when the chat flows, I say something like "I'm nerdy. I like videogames, I search for new hardware shit that comes out and I like to study"
AtomicShroom
Banned
(04-20-2017, 07:38 PM)
I don't use dating sites, but if I did I would list gaming as one of my hobbies. I certainly wouldn't go in-depth into it like you do (it makes it sound a tad obsessive and like it's the only thing you do at all), but it would certainly be mentioned.

Edit: I mean, why would you hide it? The girl is going to find out sooner or later, and if it's a deal-breaker for her, then she might as well know from the get-go. I don't think I could date a girl that isn't a somewhat of a geeky gamer.
Last edited by AtomicShroom; 04-20-2017 at 07:41 PM.
VRMN
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:39 PM)
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I'm not going to make it a overt focus or anything, but if a girl is going to be be repelled by my geekier side, just from it being present, we're not going to click. I do want to share my hobbies with my girlfriend, and that includes games.
TylerDurden4321
Member
(04-20-2017, 07:55 PM)
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I think, I would try to sell it differently. Show that your gaming is socializing!

- maybe you play video games in a club with old friends from school who now live all over the country as a meet-up
- maybe you train kids at fighting games and show them how to build their own fight stick
- or just show a picture at a local video game expo where you look happy and are having fun with like-minded guys and a charming smile

just 3 examples from the back of my head.
dmaul1114
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:00 PM)

Originally Posted by LordKasual

If gaming / nerd shit is a big part of your life, and you're on a dating site and don't mention it...like, what are you expecting out of the dating website? You're basically begging for a chemistry-less date. Unless you're only looking for sex, in which case i guess you're fine, just don't expect much else out of it. After a while of not including any nerd shit whatsoever on my profile, i've long since decided to just (GASP) be myself, and the quality of the chicks i match with are significantly better, even when we both match just for sex. In fact I think it actually happens more now ironically...should have started doing it way earlier.

I suppose that's true. If someone is obsessively into any hobby it's important to list and things will crash and burn otherwise as a lot of people don't want a partner who is obsessively into a hobby. They're looking for potential partners with stable careers, good in comes, who will be good mothers/fathers (for those who want kids) and being obsessively into any hobby is a big red flag on those fronts as that's time not going into career and maximizing earnings, social outings, parenting etc.

I didn't list my hobbies as I'm not obsessively into any of them, and didn't want to date women who weren't career driven and earning decent money like myself as I wanted a partner who'd improve my standard of living, had a busy career etc. Hobbies are important as I'm someone that needs my own alone time for sure, but that's pretty far down the list and given the alone time thing I prefer my partner to have different hobbies than mine.
Fisty
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:01 PM)
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I'd rather explain my video game addiction after getting laid, mentioning it beforehand gives you a like 80% chance of getting shot down immediately. There's still a lot of stigma about it out there, unfortunately.
13ruce
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:02 PM)
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No but i find online dating boring anyway i prefer the old fashioned way of going out and meet people there while having fun.

I had a profile a few years ago but meh it's nothing for me yet. Might be if i am older and not meet my soulmate before i finish my study.

Also since my father got very ill i am not really into having a serious/longterm relationship anyway for the time being.

When i had a profile i did not have gamig on there btw.
Drinkel
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:04 PM)
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Since I work in the industry I usually say I make games instead, partly because people usually are at least somewhat interested in how that works and partly because it turns gaming into a constructive thing. I realize that last part is a combination of insecurity and perceived stigma. I don't like to make a big deal out of it but it would also seem slightly dishonest to not mention it.

I never mention the anime tho, that's a surprise.
Last edited by Drinkel; 04-20-2017 at 08:07 PM.
kitchenmotors
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:07 PM)
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Originally Posted by casey_contra

Hahaha, yeah why not?! No one has brought it up but I figured it would be fun if I connected with a fellow gaffer over Scruff.

I think it's fine, at least with the gay crowd.

I was also at one of those Switch events in Chicago with my boyfriend. We had met on Tinder because of our love of music and, yes, gaming. He even casually browses GAF.
Hyun Sai
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:08 PM)
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Waiting till gaming is in the Olympics.
The_Spaniard
Netmarble
(04-20-2017, 08:09 PM)
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Originally Posted by SarusGray

They were interested in other things ;-)

it was too damn long

my dating profile was more like a biography than anything LOL

This post was too damn long.
SOLDIER
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:10 PM)
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Out of curiosity, are there any other dating sites that let you put gaming profile names on your profile, or are even focused on pairing gamers together?

While I don't think it's a requirement for my SO to be into videogames, I think it would be a good conversation starter to form a potential relationship. The big sites like OKCupid or PoF rarely do it for me, so perhaps something with a more niche focus would help narrow down potential partners.

I remember way back someone said they found their SO through a Final Fantasy XIV Facebook group. Would be great if I had a resource like that locally.
Northeastmonk
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:10 PM)
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Originally Posted by Drinkel

Since I work in the industry I usually say I make games instead, partly because people usually are at least somewhat interested in how that works and partly because it turns gaming into a somewhat constructive thing. I realize that last part is a combination of insecurity and perceived stigma. I don't like to make a big deal out of it but it would also seem somewhat dishonest to not mention it.

Fancy cars, giant house parties, and multiple interviews. What's there to hide? :)

If you're a game designer, you might as well have confidence in your career. It'll probably show in your work performance. At least that's how I'd see it. This takes me to that place where I don't think every game designer makes the same amount of money. If you pulled in six figures you might as well mention it. It got food on your table, a house over head, and everything else.

I'm not trying to take a jab or attack you, just some stuff that comes to my mind when I read this. Also, doesn't crunch time does take a lot away from family and friends? They might want to know about that.
Juraash
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(04-20-2017, 08:12 PM)
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I think if it's a big part of your life and one of your hobbies you should include it. At least if you are looking for something more long term.

You want someone who will accept who you are and if gaming is part of it it's probably best to just be upfront. I don't think gaming carries the same stigma it did 10 or 15 years ago, but there are still people who view them negatively. Best to weed out people who aren't interested in a partner who plays games.
Weltall Zero
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:15 PM)
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When I broke with my first GF and decided to try Meetic, I made a point to mention my love of games and scifi. One or two weeks later, I met my current significant other (she actually contacted me, which is quite rare for dating sites).

We've been together for 11 years, living together for 5 (with our four cats); we've just finished BotW together a few days ago (neither of us could get enough of it). I'll let you decide for yourself whether being honest was the right approach.

If you're going to hide a part of yourself in your dating profile, you are 1) probably not ready for a satisfactory long term relationship anyway, and 2) going to waste a huge amount of precious time. There are millions of people out there and only a fraction of them are compatible with you; don't obfuscate information about yourself and make matching more difficult than it already is.
LucidMomentum
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:17 PM)
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I run Smash tournaments in town and am a big part of the scene in my area.

So I kind of have to mention why every other Saturday is occupied.

With that being said, yeah I mention it as one of my hobbies. I kind of have to, as it'd be hard to hide or downplay.
lucas8913
Junior Member
(04-20-2017, 08:17 PM)
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I don't use dating apps, but I'm pretty sure anyone would guess I'm into gaming from my face alone.
aquamala
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:17 PM)
sure it's a hobby why hide it
Creepy
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:17 PM)
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Hell no... I want those few days before they know I'm a creepy weirdo.
That's when I can trick them into liking me.
If they see my games room, that's when they run...

That lock doesn't open until they've showed a significant interest in weeby pervy nerdy stuff.
Basketball
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:18 PM)
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Originally Posted by Bedlam

As a guy looking for girls? No, unfortunately the world is not yet ready for this.

As a girl? Yeah, you'd probably receive even more attention (at least I'm encouraged when I see this).

fucked up world
Gravy Boat
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:18 PM)
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It's been several years since I was on a dating site but I had it mentioned on my profile, as I did with all my other hobbies and interests. I had no problem meeting people.
LordKasual
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:19 PM)

Originally Posted by brawly

Lol @ the notion that building chemistry with someone is based on her knowing that I play videogames. That's laughable. If you put that much importance on it, then by all means definitely include it in your bio. I can go an evening without talking about videogames just fine.

That's not really the point. Games rarely ever come up in a date conversation for me unless the girl is a literal gamer, and even then taste in videogames varies about as much a taste in movie genres...so it isn't really about having something to talk about.

If you identify as a gamer, and you avoid putting it in your dating profile, then it probably means a) you're ashamed of it, or b) you think it'll hurt your chances more than help. Which is a problem in both cases because there's no reason for it to do either of those. If you're actively avoiding a big part of you because you think girls don't find it cool...that just sounds weak to me.

But again, if you're only after sex, none of this really matters
Darkstorne
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(04-20-2017, 08:20 PM)
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Nope, but I mainly focused on the things I get paid to do. That did include a reference to writing the occasional video game article though, but right at the end of the list (ecology, digital art, photography, then video game writing). When I mentioned hobbies I focused pretty much entirely on hiking and travel, since that's just much more interesting at a glance and easier to share images of. It's not that gaming is embarrassing to me, I just think it's a boring thing to list. Same way I would be bored if a girl wrote "I love watching TV" on her profile. Of course you watch TV, who doesn't? Of course I play games.

Had zero issues with gaming being a problem when I started inviting girls over, but again, it's not something I did much of when they were around. I have a glass cabinet displaying my favourite series with CE copies and they all found that interesting despite none of them being particularly into gaming. So long as it doesn't define you it's simply a quirk at worst, and quirks are lovable =P The girl I've been with for two years now (met online) doesn't even know what to do with a PS4 controller. It's more of an alone time thing for me since I'm a huge fan of Elder Scrolls, Witcher, Final Fantasy etc. I can understand some gamers wanting to specifically meet other people who live and breathe video games, who not only know what E3 is but get equally excited about it, but I like video games being my thing and wanted a relationship that has shared interests in travel, work, politics, etc rather than games =)
Last edited by Darkstorne; 04-20-2017 at 08:24 PM.
Mattakuevan
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:20 PM)
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I dont use dating sites, but if I did I would definitely include it.

To not say anything would be stupid. Its such a big part of my life that it would completely misrepresent who I am.
jrh2
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:20 PM)
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I've been married for almost a decade, but if I were going to use online dating today, I don't think I'd include it. Not because I'm ashamed of it or anything, just that it's not a critical part of compatibility for me. My wife actively dislikes video games and we're very happy despite my hobby.
SweetJohnnyCage
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:26 PM)
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Originally Posted by The_Spaniard


I find it a bit odd how some people are saying, "No never!" as if you're suggesting talking about your kinks and fetishes in your dating profile.

You should do that as well, honestly.

I actually had two profiles on OKC. One was pretty vanilla, nothing sex related. The other was the exact same thing, just had all the sex stuff listed. I did it as an experiment after I read an article about someone doing the same thing. That's the one my current GF messaged me on and it worked out pretty well, over a year later now.

Better to get anything you might be slightly embarrassed about or worried about being a dealbreaker out in the open.
Trojita
Rapid Response Threadmaker
(04-20-2017, 08:28 PM)
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We got married, had a kid, and then I whispered into her ear "I like anime".
ZombiePlatypus
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:30 PM)
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Yea. It doesn't define me, but it's something I love. I can't be with someone that's gonna have an issue with it, so might as well be up-front. If someone's gonna make assumptions and immediately write me off by seeing it in my profile, then we're better off not wasting eachother's time together anyway.
Dandy Crocodile
Member
(04-20-2017, 08:32 PM)
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I did when I used them. Playing video games is my primary hobby so if a guy on Grindr didn't like it I wouldn't have dated them.
I think it's maybe different for gay men though? I don't know how the straights do it but from my experience a lot of the guys I was interested in had at least some interest in gaming.

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